I notice that my glorious peonies no longer hold the same beauty today. They seem too big for themselves. They collapse onto the grass and dirt. Even when coaxed by a cage to stand tall and firm, they outgrow it and fall.
I'm standing in front of this bush, and I think about the weight of self-focus and self-absorbing tendencies that make us collapse and suffer in the prison of our own egos.
"I have a better purpose for you," I say with garden shears in hand. "You will make the world beautiful, so just stop thinking about yourself all day long." I'm laughing at these fat peonies and taking a good long look at my own spiritual tendencies.
Balancing introspection with the mission to love a hurting world challenges me some days. God takes us in hand, prunes us, and uses us to showcase beauty to a hurting world.
Otherwise, we just collapse under our own weight into the dirt. God, prune me! Lift me up from the dirt and use me!
Have you found a good balance between self-focus and focus on others?