Thursday, November 4, 2010

What We Think and Do Not Say

Yesterday, I write an unusual email to a friend who lives in a different part of the country.  We rarely talk on the phone.  We haven't seen each other for years.  But this week, I think about her several times for interesting reasons.  So I write a numbered list of all the times her face came to mind. 

She's the friend who introduced me to the joy of cooking on a baking stone, and whenever I bring it out, I think about her.

I think of her when I order elaborate coffee drinks because we did that together years ago.

I think about her when I see pistachios because she once told me about a delicious recipe involving a pistachio crust.

Random things.  Fleeting things.

But I was thinking about her.  And it occurs to me to tell her this.   How would she know otherwise? 

Later, she emails me back to tell me she printed out my list and put it in her journal.   I think about that little list--baking stones, coffee, pistachios--that seems silly and unimportant. 

It matters so much.

9 comments:

Alicia said...

This is why facebook is so detrimental to real relationships! Thanks for the reminder.

Jenny said...

But I was thinking about her. And it occurs to me to tell her this. How would she know otherwise?

Oh Yes! Thank you for this. Sometimes we save communication for the important times, and dare I say, we then miss the importance of communication.

Again, thank you. This touched me very deeply.

disastrously said...

I was misled by the title. Often I find myself thinking of things I could say but choose not to because those (honest) mean things from a friend or loved on hurt the most and stick with you longest. I'm glad that this was a happier note; maybe I should follow suit.

disastrously said...

... Please forgive my typo. How embarrassing.

jenny_o said...

It's always the right time to tell someone you thought about them. Nice post.

The Bakers said...

Great Post! We have friends who live in other countries too!

Karen said...

I've known my girlfriend since we were 6 years old-52 years! Today is her 58th birthday and I now have an idea of what to write in her birthday card. Thanks for the idea, Heather. blessings on your day!

Roberta @ Silverwalk said...

I find it interesting to be able to say one of my best friends I know only through email. However, this past year was extremely traumatic for her as she went through breast cancer treatment, surgeries, radiation, and chemo. Sometimes, one communicates w/o knowing. As part of my email signature, I use a quote from Julian of Norwich, "All will be well." My dear friend took that to heart - using it as a mantra to get her through the year, then posting it all over when she was able to do a breast cancer walk in October. I am extremely humbled and honored by her actions. Thank you for reminding us to communicate when we can!

Anonymous said...

I have been thinking about how I save things i want to say for a "better" time. But really, we never know if we're going to get a chance again to say something important(or not so important) I guess i just need to lose my fear and do it! thanks Heather..you inspire me...