Today, I remembered something unique about God's economy. In Christianity, the move you give, the more you receive. The times when you feel last, you are actually first. The times you act as a servant, you become the leader. I wonder about this upside down approach to living. Some mornings, I feel the weight of various insecurities--mostly relational or financial. I worry about all sorts of relationships: family, friends, co-workers. And then I worry about financial things: what I need, what my children will need, what our future might require of our resources.
What a debilitating way to conduct myself during the day! Insecurity becomes a prison. Insecurity keeps my focus on myself--what I need, what I'm getting, and what I'm not getting. I feel insecure because of what I think I'm missing.
What's the solution to insecurity?
Insecurity arises out of a heart that's concerned with what it's not getting. When I turn the kaleidoscope and focus on what I can give, who I can love, and what I can provide for others, I see the day in a whole new way. I stop worrying so much about myself because I'm living abundantly according to spiritual and not material principles.
I'm trying to teach my children that as long as they worry about who likes them and what they can accumulate, they will continue to live under the illusion of security. Their souls won't rest. But when they choose to love and give generously to others, miraculously, they find the kind of relational and financial security they seek. It's the model that Jesus teaches, however confusing and however counter-intuitive. I pray we can have the wisdom to live like that.